The Art of Power

About a week ago I shared my reflections from the book I was reading, 
The Art of Power.

I finished this a few days ago and have been digesting what I read and learned.

Times like these make me wish I had a gift for writing.

My mind has a tendency to ramble and roam around holding a multitude of ideas, thoughts, musings and philosophies all at once, making it quite difficult to ever get to a point or conclusion.

(You have most likely noticed this about me already.)

I have learned a few things about myself over the course of reading The Art of Power.

And I have read some things that I hope will stick with me for quite some time.

Never believing I was very good at writing book reports or succinctly sharing my thoughts makes me a bit nervous to blog about this.

Yet, I have a lot of thoughts that I need to share somewhere.

So here is my attempt....

In the introduction of the book I read, "When we live without awareness, without the ability to truly see the world around us, our life is often like a runaway train...Mindfulness is being fully present in the here and now, being in touch with what is going on inside us and around us."

So as one who has felt as though I was living my life on a runaway train heading someplace unknown, I was intrigued from the very beginning of the book.

Some people believe time is money, and that time is limited. And I suppose one could make a great case of proving this to be true. 

But for me, at this stage of my life, I have lots of time.

In fact, I have an abundance of time, and it's not at all about money.

Time is Life!

And Life is precious. 

We have just 24 hours each day to live life and I want to live mine in a mindful way present of the here and now, knowing that the Kingdom of God is at hand.

I have wasted too much time regretting the past or worrying about the future.

Too many days went by and I was not present.

Too many missed opportunities to be present when a friend was hurting.

Too many times I have shushed the kids because of my own thoughts or worries.

Too many days I went to sleep at night caught up in my own world of doubts or fears.

I plan to take some of this time to teach myself to be more mindful of the present, more mindful of the here and now.

In addition to learning to be present, I want to work on and share with my kids that true happiness and true power lie in understanding yourself, accepting yourself, and having confidence in yourself.

I struggled with understanding and accepting myself the past few years and realize now that I was looking for acceptance from my workplace, my job, from other people.  
I wanted to be valued. 
I wanted to feel important. 

Yet, no matter what I did, it wasn't enough. 

I lost confidence in myself and my spirit suffered.

I know I am not alone in this.

So many of us look outside ourselves for acceptance and worth.

It is part of our human frailty.

I see my children struggling with understanding and accepting themselves and not being confident in their own goodness.  
I know that this is part of life and especially part of the teen years.

But I want to help them through this and I hope by being more mindful and more present that they can see their own value.

Beauty comes from being yourself.

You don't need to be seen as beautiful by others to be accepted.

You just need to see the beauty within yourself.

I used to know this.

My mom taught me this when I was much younger.

But I forgot that lesson in living life on a runaway train.

Life is a bit more stable now.

I feel a bit more grounded.

And I have more time to experience life.

And with life and a bit of mindfulness can come happiness, peace and love.

That is the true Art of Power.

AARP? Really?

Today in the mail I received my invite to the AARP.
Really?
Can I be so old already?

I know I turn 50 this year, but I have 6 months left of my 40's.
It isn't that I am scared to reach 50 years of age, half a century of life.
It is that I wonder how 50 years has passed so quickly.
Where did the time go?
Where did my life go?
What happened to all the things my 8 year old mind thought I would have done by now?

And how do I begin to accomplish some of those things now?
How much time do I have?
If 50 years has come and gone in a blink of an eye,
how fast will the next 50 years come and go?
What if I am not fortunate enough to live another 50 years?
What if I am not healthy enough to live to 100.

Perhaps I should start watching what I eat more, exercise more, drink less, stress less.

Oh wait, can I stress less and drink less at the same time?

Oh so many questions from simply opening the mail.

-- Post From DWNTWN's iPhone

Go to the Places that Scare you.

I saw a book a month or so ago that caught my eye.  It was titled,
“Go to the places that scare you.”
I didn't pick it up at the time instead getting "The Art of Power".
A few days ago, in another blog I read, I came across the title again, “Go to the places that scare you.” It is written by a Buddhist teacher Pema Chodron.
( I may have to read this next. )

This has made me think and reflect on,
When recently have I gone to a place that scares me?
When was the last time I risked?
Took a chance?
Stepped out and stepped up?

Lent is rapidly winding down and we are nearing Holy Week.

I have to ask myself what I have I done to walk closer with God these past 30 days or so?

We talk about Lent being a time in the desert. a time of sacrifice, of searching, of seeking God, of trusting that we will find God.

I've been to the desert.  I find it to be a scary place, beautiful in it's own way, but scary.  The heat can over take you quickly.  There is not much to offer shade from the sun and the heat.  If you don't have adequate water you can die.  Not to mention the scary creatures; lizards that look like they come from someplace prehistoric, poisonous snakes, and things that live in the cacti.

But that’s what the Spirit made Jesus do... go into the desert for 40 days....
– to go to the places we would rather avoid, to go to the places that scare you takes faith.
And we go because something essential happens there.
That’ s where life gets real.
But there is danger in my complacency as well.
The danger is different than that of the desert, but it is there and it is just as real.
Hidden in my complacency is laziness, apathy, distrust, and lack of faith.
Throughout Lent I have contemplated,
thought about,
recommitted myself,
and started over again.
I have been easily distracted.
I lost focus, forgetten about why I should 'go to the desert'.
It has been easier to go about life not giving anything up, not sacrificing much, not going any place that might scare me.
I would not consider my Lenten Journey successful... yet

But its time.
It's time to risk.
It's time to face the things that frighten and scare.
It's time to let something essential happen to me.

The Secret to Happiness

I’ve been slowly working my way through a book by Thich Nhat Hahn titled

The Art of power.
I’m in search of that occasionally or often times elusive inner peace and happiness.
I know it needs to come from within, that is where I found it before.
Happiness can’t be handed to me, purchased for me, or prayed over me.
I have to re-discover and uncover its secret all on my own.

I am only able to absorb this book a chapter or two at a time.
Today I read the 2 chapters; Getting What We Really Want and The Secret to Happiness.

A number of concepts and ideas are rolling around in my head.  I want to spend more time with the simplicity of, 

“Your action, what you do, depends on who you are.  The quality of your action depends on the quality of your being… To make another person happy you have to be happy yourself.  So there is a link between doing and being.  If you don’t succeed in being, you can’t succeed in doing. 

Happiness becomes possible when we realize we have a path, when we know where we are going. If you don’t have the impression that you are on the right path, if you don’t know where you are going, you suffer, you feel lost and confused.  Happiness is feeling that you are on the right path every moment.  You don’t need to arrive at the end of the path to be happy.  You are happy right here and right now.  

…  When you have a path and you enjoy every step on your path, you are already someone.  You don’t need to become someone else.  You already are what you want to become, practicing nonaction, the art of being. 

… When we pursue individual happiness, our satisfaction is always ultimately fleeting, because individual happiness is not possible.  Our happiness, our existence, is dependent on the existence and happiness of everyone and everything else “

Since quitting my job in December, well, no that isn’t true…
Since leaving my job in the summer of 2006 I have been wandering and wondering if I was on the ‘right path’.
My spirit has felt lost.
I have been confused.

I am hoping I am on the right path now.
I believe I am on the right path now.
I hope this path is a path of happiness for everyone and everything else.

Because if it is, then I too will find the happiness I have been searching for.

My Edge of the world

I've never tried to post a video in my blog before.
But I thought since I haven't blogged in 5 days and I have some time by myself right now that I'd give it a shot.

http://gallery.me.com/jbrownflash/100150/The%20Edge
I brought the girls here for a jump start to their spring break and it is definately spring like weather.


Usually at the coast I need a couple layers of fleece.
But not today.



A simple short sleeve T and this gorgeous sun is all I need.
And this camera,
And I need these sunglasses,
And This beer,


And I need this...

Well if you've seen the movie The Jerk then you are finishing the blog for me
:-)

If you copy and paste the link to the video it should work.
http://gallery.me.com/jbrownflash/100150/The%20Edge
I had trouble posting from my phone.
-- Post From DWNTWN's iPhone

Location:Pacific City,United States

Heading Home

Well...
It's been another fun trip to San Francisco.
It is such a joy to spend time with my sister.
We both agreed we need to find a way to do this again and include Nancy & Jen.
Life is too short to not!


Last night was gorgeous and so was today.
We have had lots of adventures in sightseeing and dinning out.


Yesterday's Ferry ride to Sausalito was absolutely beautiful.
I am anxious to download the photos from my Nikon.


We closed our day yesterday with dinner at a great Restaurant that had
Live Jazz.
And today we took another swing through Chinatown.


Now I am waiting on my flight back to Portland.


Good ole Southwest.
It
Looks like smooth flying from here to home.

-- Post From DWNTWN's iPhone

Location:Airport Dr,Oakland,United States

Letting go of Worry

Yesterday my oldest son Brad got on a plane bound for Rome, London, and eventually, Paris.
And I am scared for him.


I believe we have done a good job of raising him, taught him to be safe, taught him to know right from wrong.
And, Brad is smart.
He is thorough and naturally careful.
But I still worry.
I don't have any control over this. If something were to go wrong, I couldn't be there to help him.
I don't even know where he will be staying, nor do I have any way to reach him.
What's a Mom to do?


I don't even know what flight he was on and if he made it to Rome.
This not knowing is so hard for me.
But I have to let it go.
I have to trust!

I did ask Brad for an itinerary before he left but this is all he sent me:

"arrive in rome friday morning
leave rome sunday night
arrive in paris monday morning
leave paris/arrive london thursdsay morning
leave london sunday morning
arrive lincoln sunday night

that's about all i got"

I know Brad to be thorough.
I know Brad to be incredibly cautious.
I also know I taught him to use punctuation.
:-)
And clearly he forgot to punctuate his email.
I worry if he will forget to be thorough and cautious while traveling abroad.

I have no option but to let go, to try not to worry, to not spend my day wondering if he made it to his first stop, Rome.

I guess all I can do is pray.
Not that prayer is a 'last resort'. What I mean is I have to have faith.
I have to believe in something I can't see, I cant touch, I can't tangibly feel.
I just have to believe and know that Brad will have a great adventure and return safely to Lincoln in 10 days.

10 Days! Ugh!


-- Post From DWNTWN's iPhone

Location:Commercial St,San Francisco,United States

Sister trip

Early this morning my sister and I headed for San Francisco.


We've haven't been away for a weekend in quite some time.
We both looked forward to this weekend.
We left PDX on separate airlines about 10 minutes apart.
Her plane was just a bit late so we landed in Oakland about the same time.


We left gray, rainy Oregon and landed in clear, sunny California!
We have enjoyed the mass transit travel and an opportunity to see some site we haven't been to before.


I have never taken a guided tour before en mass with 70 other people.
It just isn't my 'cup-o-tea'.
But Chris arranged for this in her effort to acquire Continuing Education Credits. So I tagged along... Again!


The bus let us get out for photo ops at 2 places; Golden Gate Bridge & Twin Peaks.
I was glad because it was an absolutely gorgeous day!


I even took the Golden Frau along for the view!
Tonight we had an amazing dinner at Lou's restaurant and Blues bar.


The music was awesome and the food was amazing!


and the best part was the drinks were big & cheap!

It was a great day and I look forward to exploring more tomorrow and seeing where my feet will carry me.


Post From DWNTWN's iPhone

Location:Commercial St,San Francisco,United States

Technology and the iPhone!

My first attempt!

I am learning to use my iPhone to its full potential and have just figured out how to post via text messaging.
I think this will help me upload photos and quick messages easier than going through Facebook all the time.
I guess we'll see.

Technology is fun!

Beware of Flying Discs!

It has been a while since I have made time to get out and about in Salem and explore.  The last time I went exploring the local parks I found myself at Woodmansee in South Salem.

I was very surprised to find a Disc Golf course hidden amongst the trails and trees in this little park.

I laughed at the brightly colored "Caution" signs posted throughout the park. 
But I suppose "Fore means LOOK OUT!" could be an important thing for unaware hikers, such as myself, to know.
After all, not everyone would be on the look out for 'Flying Discs'!

Jeff and I set out in search of the various baskets that one aims for in Disc Golf.
Unlike playing Disc Golf in the flat land of Nebraska, the baskets are not easy to spot.


We walked up and down hills, through and around trees in search of the next 'hole'.
It was delightful to find them topped with yellow daisies! 


I still wonder if the Disc Golf baskets came with the little yellow daisies on top or if those were added by someone afterwards. 
And if they were added afterwards, what was the intent of the flower bearer?
To bring delight to those just hiking along the trails? 


It might have been someone's peaceful statement as to their disappointment of having metal structures and signs posted in this wooded park.
Or were they just having some fun?  

In any event, it certainly caught my attention, intrigued me enough to explore more of the park, and certainly brought a smile to my face. 


In my exploration of Woodmansee, my search for the next hole and desire to see if there were daisies perched atop, I also found some local wild life. 




I particularly liked this little squirrel that seemed to stop and take as much time watching me as I took in watching him, ... or maybe her.

As spring arrives in full force in just a couple of weeks, I hope to make more time for exploring the local parks.

Then all if need to do is figure out what to do with all the photos I am taking.

Maybe I should open a gallery...

Waistin' time.

I haven't made much time for blogging lately.
I haven't made much time for me.
I was up early this morning.
I took the girls to school since we are still down a vehicle after the Silver Bullet died in late January.

I paid bills.
I put the steaks in the marinade for dinner tonight.
Then I picked up the kitchen for the 13th time this week and was contemplating cleaning the bathrooms and scrubbing the toilets.
But instead decided to grab my camera and go for a drive.
So here I sit on the beach watching the tide roll in wondering...
And blogging...

I can't only blog while at the beach, I know this.
I can blog at home.
However, I seem to be caught in this daytime pattern of clean or cook, cook or clean, and some days just to mix things up a bit it is cook & clean while doing a bit of laundry.

So today I took a break and took off.
After all, the toilets will still need cleaning tomorrow and I will be home.

Unless I grab my camera and head for the hills!




P.S.
My collection of beach treasures from today...



- Post From DWNTWN's iPhone