Drift or Paddle?

Some people might wonder what took me so long....
Others might be empathetic....
And a few will never understand, but simply be glad....



One year ago today I took a good friend to the airport and said good-bye.

That simple good-bye felt like the last few strands of my lifeline had been cut.
It was my lifeline to what was familiar, what was comfortable, what was home.

It was time for me to sink or swim.

In the first few days after we moved I felt more like I was sinking than swimming. I felt more often like I was under the surface fighting to get my head above water. Several months after that I felt water logged, and my fingers we quite shriveled, but I was able to catch my breath.

Now it has been a year. It feels more like I have found a boat to crawl into. I am out of the deep water and drifting now. I am able to enjoy the beauty around me. I am waiting to see where the tide takes me.

There are still stormy seas that rock my boat; rock my world. It is still scary at times and I worry about what might capsize me and throw me back into the deep water, But that comes with life no matter where I have been. I am now able to see that there are also great adventures all around me.

I am beginning to like this place.

I am anxious to see where I will be, how I will feel a year from now.
Will I still be drifting? Will I like where the tide has taken me?
Or
Will I have a paddle and take a more active role in where I go and what I do?

There is adventure in taking the journey however it comes. There is also adventure in setting one's own course.

For now I am comfortable, dry, and content to see where this tide is taking me.